October 20, 2008 ~ Charlotte's Webb MY BOOTY ~

In my previous post I mentioned that I am scared of spiders. I do not like them...I do not like them in a case, I do not like them in a vase, I do not like them dead or alive,I do not like them in a pan, I do not like them Sam I am. Camryn and I have been watching Charlotte's Webb and well isn't Charlotte just lovely... all sweet and wanting to save Wilber and stuff. HA! Well, Thursday night I'm just sitting down on the toilet to go #1 when Camryn walked out of the bathroom (of course she was in there, I can't go pee without her being in there with me). Anyway, she gasped and said "Momma there is a huge spider on the wall". I got up thinking it's gonna be a normal spider...I mean, she is MY child and tends to have a flare for the dramatic. When I rounded the corner and looked up I saw the biggest spider I have ever seen in my life. Seriously...I'm sooooo not being dramatic. It was probably 3 to 4 inches across. I'm NOT EVEN KIDDING!!!! So, being the calm, cool and collected person that I am, I gasp and yell at Camryn to get up on the couch. I mean really, this thing is huge and I wouldn't want it to jump around the door facing and get on her in the back bedroom. I do the first thing that makes sense and go grab a spray bottle of bleach cleaner, a chair and my largest shoe. You may be wondering why the bleach cleaner...well, in my mind I'm thinking I spray it with bleach and it will slow it down enough for me to smash it. So, I go to spraying with a vengeance. The stupid thing fell to the floor and I just kept on spraying as if my life depended on it. Then *WHAM* I smash it with my shoe. WHEW...seriously, that's the worst part of being single. I'm a firm believer in "the man is supposed to kill the bug". UGH! Anyway, now I have a light spot on my carpet, because it never dawned on me that I was spraying bleach on it. Oh well, it got the job done! And, no, I didn't go pee...I totally lost the urge after that.